Things you don’t typically hear at a Chess tournament

“I’m gonna stick that bishop up your ass and turn you into a popsicle”

“Cheater! Cheater! Cheater! I’m taking my board and going home!”

“Can I have a take back?”

“That opening is like your momma; used by everyone!”

“Where the hell are the Doritos and beer?” “It’s game time!”

“Can I substitute the white pieces with my special Sponge Bob chess pieces?”