Friday, October 20, 2006

Rebirth

You know...how can I truly quit when there is just so much stupid stuff going on around me? It's just too tempting to make comments on. Let's talk about a few, shall we? Pull up a bean bag...

Don't be Foley'd by the Priest. Ok, I just had to laugh when I read how they tracked down the priest that molested Foley umpteen years ago. So he says something like (and I'm paraphrazing here) "well I rubbed his naked body but I don't recall having sex". Don't recall? Ok, I could accept that he couldn't recall what he had for dinner back then but come on...I think he'd recall that! Time to recall him from his tropical getaway and throw his pedafile butt in jail!

Instant Reality. I've got a great new reality TV show. We'll rip stuff right out of the headlines and use them for the show. For example, episode one can feature the newly released "Dog the Bounty Hunter" going after Blade himself (aka Wesley Snipes) and extraditing him from Africa where he is currently hiding err.. shooting a film after being caught as a tax evador (I like that "Tax Evador"...sounds very super heroish). Sort of an amazing race meets survivor theme. Hey, on the way back he could extradite another adoption baby for Madonna or Angelina or one of those publicity seeking goody-goody celebrities that need the PR. They could all compete for the attention and then let the baby drool on each one to signify they've been voted off the competition for the celeb-a-baby.

Remotely Invisible. Ok, did you see where the scientists were able to make an object partially invisible (is that like "only mostly dead"?...pulled that line from The Princess Bride). Anyway, it paves the way to actually having real like cloaking. Very wild. Of course, I'm pretty sure they've been using my house as a testing site for years. Single socks, remote controls; yeah, they're all cloaked...and it's pissing me off!! Oh, and I'm just wondering here...in the future could I walk around naked and just cloak my privates and not get arrested? It would save on having to do laundry...

And has the whole world now gone conservative? This Austrian urinal must be taken out. Jeez, even in Europe they don't have a sense of humor. I thought it was pretty darn funny. Ok, it's bathroom humor...the most childish form of humor but come on guys, only the Stooges could top this for guy humor! I'll be featuring a bathroom post in the future because one can never have enough potty humor.

Well, ok, that's about enough nonsense for you to handle today. Seriously, I wonder if anyone will come back to my blog after having abandoned it for 11 days, 11 hours, and 56 minutes. We'll see...

4 comments:

markjamesmurphy said...

YAAAAY you're back!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Welcome back! Do not do that to us again please -D

House of Suz said...

Maybe if they made that urinal into the Rolling Stone's logo it would fly.

Variant E said...

Yeah, that's what I thought of when I saw it too. Do you think if you made it the face of Bin Laden and had the mouth open with an expression that it would fly?