Monday, November 13, 2006

Nobody does this anymore

I’m going to dedicate this month to doing things that nobody does anymore.



First, I’m going to read the Bible from start to finish in one sitting; like a novel. It flows so well all the way through.













Then, I’m going to buy an 8mm camcorder and read the manual cover to cover before I take it out of the box to make sure I know the use of everything.











I’m even going to not use the remote controls. Instead, I’ll actually get up and use the physical buttons on the TV and cable box itself.








After that I’m going to go out and buy some nice stationary and write letters to all of my friends. I’ll use proper sentence structure and everything. Then, I’ll find actual stamps and mail them.










Once I am done there, I’ll do some bloodletting; because we all know how beneficial a good bloodletting can be for ones health.











And with my new found vitality and reflex capacity I will engage in a pistol duel at dawn with that person that cut me off on the freeway.










I might even celebrate Thanksgiving before starting Christmas activities. I know; it’s crazy talk, but that’s the theme for the month.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I haven't read the bible in years. I wonder if the sequel is done yet?

Nothing like a little phlebotomy to balance the humors and prepare one for a duel.

All in all, sounds like great fun.

House of Suz said...

That's some crazy workout. I mean not using the remote control.

Variant E said...

Yes, but sacrifices must be made these days to dare to be different.

Conti said...

Are you sure you don't want to just watch television and eat graham crackers? That's what I'd do.

Anonymous said...

Oh, go with the graham crackers! You can't go wrong! And you'll still be going old school if you eat the kind without the cinnamon-sugar coating...

padraig said...

You forgot "post to Usenet". That's clearly the most ancient.