Wednesday, May 30, 2007

The Pursuit of Movie Absorbtion

Ok, so it's mid 80s, sunny, low humidity, why would I be blogging. Well, work happens and the best thing about work is avoiding it and thus blogging...

This being summer season now, all the summer movies are coming out. Why not do a post on movies? Me; I love to get absorbed into a movie if I'm going to pay $28.50 for a movie (that's with crappy snacks of course).

Here are some absorbers you can't help but become...

Rocky. When that theme music comes on and he’s doing some impossible upside down sit up; my abs are tightening with each rep. Who can’t resist wanting to put on a heavy 100% cotton warm up suit and run full out through a busy city when Rocky does it? I salivate at the thought of finding a meat locker truck and punching raw beef.

The Pursuit of Happyness. Who doesn’t want to do the right thing after watching this? It almost made me feel work is noble and interesting again. Almost. And how can I complain about the fact that the room for my pool table has one spot you have to use a short cue stick with after watching them sleep in a restroom?

Good Will Hunting. I suddenly felt so much smarter. I wanted to go out and solve the dilemma of trisecting a triangle using only a compass and ruler, to truly explain gravity, to advance string theory and apply quantum mechanics to something beyond subatomic particles. Also, it would be handy to speed read like he did too. But mostly I just wanted to hang out in a Harvard bar and catch some schmuck passing obscure book quotes off as his own so I could quote something fancy to him from page 198 of the same book he plagiarized from.

Finding Forrester. I want to go down to the library and read all the classics (well, at least look them up on Wikipedia). I want to type great prose in an improvisational style on a manual typewriter. Hell, I just want to say I have a manual typewriter. I’ll go hang out with JD Salinger and talk literary things.

Bravehart. Who doesn’t want to paint their face blue (I mean; the Blue man group did it)? Who doesn’t want to run around the countryside in a kilt screaming freedom? It makes me want to assemble a giant mob so I can run screaming and fighting into them at full speed just to see if I could actually make it out again alive.

5 comments:

Jenny! said...

Braveheart makes me want to kick some ass!

iamnot said...

Rocky
Punch beef? No, not so much really.

Happyness
Haven't seen it. Can't the guy spell?

Good Will
Mostly it just makes me want to diddle Mini Driver (like I didn't want to already).

Finding Forrester
Never seen it. I learned on a manual typewriter though...not going back.

Braveheart
Sure, it's all fun til someone pokes an eye out.

Kurt said...

I've seen Rocky, GWH, and FF. I never liked Mel Gibson, even before he revealed his true nature.

Scary Monster said...

Me figures iffin Me wanna get into a movie, Me would have to choose Ben Hur. The ideah of making a great comeback as well as riding a chariot pulled by wild stallions around the Flavian be me kind of excitement.

Variant E said...

That's right Jenny, buck kicking is the theme after that movie!

iamnot, the spelling of happyness is an inside joke in the movie

Kurt, no Mel huh? I do like him in Payback; it gets all my rage and violence out. And then there is road warrior...

SM, excellent choice. Chariots are good!