Friday, September 07, 2007

Cat in the Hat in Modern Times

If the Cat in the Hat were here today
What would he do, with whom would he play?

For playing alone with two kids I cannot envision
He’d certainly be reported to the Children Services Division

Michael Vik would have him out fighting for money
But perhaps making him turn Garfield into lasagna would be funny

But supposing he got into the house all the same
He’d never get their attention from their X-Box Game

That stacking game with the cake, he might as well not try it
Too many carbs there for their new Atkins diet

Thing one and thing two were just way, way too hyper
Now on Ritalin they drool and smile in their diaper

Though the gadgets are nice on his clean up machine
The fuel it uses makes it not “green”

Yes many things now would probably cause him to have fainted
Not to worry about that though because his cat foods all tainted


Unknown said...

You must admit,
Although of Seuss we never tire
That they screwed the pooch
When they casted Mike Myers

Nice post VE.

Logophile said...

I love the Dr.
Thing One and Thing Two are not on drugs or in diapers.
They live here with me but they are not nearly as into cleaning up as Ted claimed.

Kurt said...

Hey, that rhymes.

Carla said...

Right on. Got to love good old Theodor.

Serena said...

Finally, the Cat in the Hat is FUN.:-)

Nessa said...

Very good. The Dr. would be proud.

Dan said...

LOL! You're right, though, he would have been dead from Chinese cat food long before Dr. Seuss ever heard of him.

Uncivil said...

Hell, they probably have tainted cat meat in chinese cat food!
Hmmmmm....Recycling the cats now?

Scary Monster said...

Man you are on a roll. Yer posts just get funnier. "Now on Ritalin they drool and smile in their diaper"

Me be tryin not to piss meself.


Camille Alexa said...

One fish,
two fish,
V fish, E.

Ed said...

kan - Boy...they messed up that movie! What a shame, what a shame, what a shame.

logophile - I'm sorry you have thing 1 and 2. I have their cousins things 3 and 4.

kurt - It seemed about the do a post with rhyme!

carla - Sort of like my kitten posts. How could I go wrong? Everyone loved kitten humor and Dr. Suess!

sj - Poor Cat in the Hat. He's had such a bad rap all these years and he's actually quite an optimist.

goldennib - One has to do the Dr. proud because he was good!

dan - Those Chinese; what ya gonna do?

uncivil - You think they have one of those machines at the store for cat recycling?

sm - Drink less liquids when you read my blog; it'll lessen the 'pee yourself' effect

camille - I like it!