Thursday, October 04, 2007

Why do you celebrate THAT???

Now that I’ve mapped out my entire year celebrating holiday or just taking vacation, I thought I should check out some of what I’m celebrating.

WTF? Even though I have personally now been to over 40 different countries across five continents; I guess I’m not as diverse or cultural as I thought because I have no clue what some of these are.

Anti Fascists Struggle Day – I looked but I couldn’t find a fascists struggle day anywhere. Talk about a one sided deal!

General Prayer Day – He was either a four-star general everyone liked or they just went major generic on this one. How about general celebration day? General sunny Tuesday day?

Good Friday – Ok, but when is Bad Friday?

Boxing Day – I don’t know; ever since all the scandals and corruption I don’t watch a lot of boxing. Do we really need a full day of watching it?

Ramadan – Is that to celebrate the invention of those quick inexpensive noodle lunches at the store?

Tomb Sweeping Day – Hey, this is a freebie day for me as I don’t have a tomb; I plan on being cremated.

Traditional Day – “Hey VE, why are we celebrating?” “Beats me, it’s a tradition.” “Ok”

Old New Years Day – Ah, see, even holidays are recycling now

Bob Marley Day – Cool, only in Jamaica, but why do you really need a holiday there anyway; everyday is a holiday I would think.

Tet Nguyen Dan – I looked at this quickly and thought it was Ted Nugent day at first

National Lamb Day – You guessed it…New Zealand. I think it was the sheep that voted for this to be a holiday in the first place.

Lantern Festival (China) – Yep, it’s the Green Lantern’s big day as grand marshall

The Fast of Nineteen Days – Well it better be fast, I’d get real hungry by that time

Revolutionary Attack on the Presidential Palace Day (Cuba) – It slightly edged out Stealthy attack to give Castro a Melvin Day

Waffle day (Sweden) – I do that most days

The other frustrating thing about holidays is all the rules. There are holidays that are:
- the seventh Sunday after Easter
- The 40th day after Easter
- The 50th day after Easter
- The 51st day after easter
- The fourth Monday of the month
- The Saturday between these two dates

Are you kidding me? How about the Seventh Friday before yesterday during leap years times pi and to the square root of the thirteenth lunar moon in the quadrant of Vulcan?

Yes, while I do find it easy to take these days off; it’s a tad bit confusing why I am doing it (other than to avoid work that is).


Jeff and Charli Lee said...

The one that confuses me is Veteran's day. This is when all federal employees get the day off even if they aren't veterans, while veterans who don't work for the government still have to punch in.

Whose day is this again?

Gnomeself Be True said...

Ok, I'm deeply offended by the Good/Bad Friday reference.
Fortunately, you also made fun of Ramadan, so with the fatwah that will be coming your way, there's no need for me to call you out on that whole Good Friday thing.

P.S. I'm just kidding about the first part.

Ed said...

jeff - I know; I'm a veteran, I haven't had it off yet! Good call.

iamnot - There's a terrorist cell mobilizing just down the street as we speak just because of my post

Unknown said...

I laughed out loud on more than a few of these. For bad Fridays, you should check my blog more often. Friday hates me. And I thought it was Ted Nugent day as well. You are getting better if that is possible.

Jenny said...

Oh, I have to say it... boxing day. I would still have it the day after Christmas, but I would go out to the stores and knock over anyone who got in my way of sales. Wait. I already do that.

Mother Theresa said...

Do you really need to know what they mean? Just get out there and par-tay!

Logophile said...

You know, figuring all that out seems like a lot of work.
Might be easier to just, ya know, head into the office and read blogs.

Kurt said...

Um, VE, Vulcan isn't a Quadrant. It's a planet in the Alpha Quadrant.

Ed said...

kan - That's funny you saw the Ted Nugent one too. And you're right, you always have the bad Fridays covered.

ab - That's what you get for getting up at 4am and trying to hit those door buster shopping deals

theresa - You're right; I probably don't need to know but sometimes I get this weird feeling I'll be held accountable for celebrating soemthing I have no clue on

logophile - A little up front preparation can yield an entire year of slacking though!

kurt - According to Alpha bi-law 5204.17 there was a further annexation around the planet Vulcan due to rezoning and over crowding that effectively created a new Vulcan quadrant around that planet. They like to think locally and act locally and their own quadrant allows them to do so. You can read the details in the "Live long and Prosper" zine.

Serena said...

I'm all for holidays. I don't care if it's Greased Pig Day and has a sordid history rooted in human sacrifice. If it's declared a holiday, I'll take it.:-)

Logophile said...

Oh Mr. VE,
I will be in your lovely town next weekend, and will of course be stopping by Powell's.
Iffen ya want to make fun of people together for a few minutes or something shoot me an email, eh?