Monday, December 03, 2007

Christmas Trees

I have yet to get my Christmas tree this year. I know, I know. I now only have 22 days to enjoy it. But having picked up one early last year only to have it look like some alien sucked out every last drop of moisture out of it right as Christmas proper hit; I thought I wouldn’t make that mistake again this year.

I used to cut my own. It’s pretty easy to find one but a big wet, messy hassle; I mean I live in Christmas tree land! There are more Christmas Trees within 5 miles of me than there are in the entire states of Nebraska and Kansas. Do they know its Christmas time at all? But I digress…

No, I won’t even get into the lighting challenges of a Christmas Tree.

I won’t elaborate on the inability of science to produce a worthy Christmas Tree stand that works.

I won’t comment on how the ornaments they are producing are almost bigger than the trees themselves.
Instead, to sum it all up…here’s a collection of whacky Christmas tree images for you to enjoy (with the proper VE commentary of course).

Don't have a tree nearby? Perhaps you have toothpicks then. A lot of toothpicks. And time. And patience. And...
I don't even want to understand how this is possible...
Live decorations must be cleared through animal control...
Bachelor Christmas cheer...

Fraternity Christmas cheer....
Teenage Christmas Cheer...
No, this isn't a Christmas tree on the Muir Space Station and no, I didn't get all rotaty with my photo software. The inverted Christmas tree craze was popular a couple of years ago. First of all, it's easier to store presents under it. Second, it's easier to actually hang ornaments on it. I just cannot get used to it though...there's just something wrong about it. It would be like Santa wearing a green suit all of a sudden...
I'm dreaming of a pink Christmas...
May your tree fit all your decorations and not catch on fire!


robkroese said...

That 2nd pic is clearly 3 different trees.

I do love the Dew tree.

Mother Theresa said...

Oooh, pick the pink one, it's just so purty. But you'd better be ready for the comments that will follow... ;)

Gnomeself Be True said...


Jeff and Charli Lee said...

We've been cutting our own every year since our kids were born (17 years). But it wouldn't take much arm twisting to convince me to invest in a quality fake one. You know, that doesn't require the cutting and the hauling and the sap and the needles all over the rug and the fire hazard and the disposal and the...

Oops, sounding a bit Scroogy there huh?

Ed said...

diesel - You're right...but it's a good effect none-the-less

theresa - After the underwear post awhile back, people would REALLY start to wonder about me if I did that

iamnot - You will be visited by three ghosts tonight...

jeff - I did the tree cutting for 13 years and then last year got one already cut from the nursery. It still had a very outdoors feel as this nursery is in the country and surrounded by tree farms. But man they dry out quick. I'm with you though, the sap and needles I could do without

justacoolcat said...

Upside down trees were all the rage around here over the last few years, but I haven't heard a thing this year. Hmmm.

We have a fake tree.

Unknown said...

I love LOVE Christmas trees and yes, they are CHRISTMAS TREES. No such animal as a "holiday tree" in my reality.

Some friends down here do a "Florida Christmas Tree" which is the normal decorations, even fake snow, but on a Palm instead. They don't shed.

Anonymous said...

Trees? Lots of Christmas trees? Are you some sort of pusher or something?

I want one of each. No, not the upside down one, that is just wrong.

Wanna come and help me make the keg one?


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