Friday, March 07, 2008

West Wing Story – Part Three

The story of unfortunate love between a democrat and a republican set among the Washington political arena. Tune in to part three of our musical tragedy:

Our story picks up with McCain searching the streets for Hillary in hopes of a little intern like meeting.

They meet on the back steps of Hillary’s hotel. Nothing happens because thank GOD this isn't an R rated play. A song ensues:

There’s a place for us
Somewhere a place for us.
A kingdome where red and blue
Represent a single hue

There’s a time for us,
Some day a time for us,
Time where we campaign again
No side would be proposing blame
Some day

I can refer to him as a spouse
And we jointly run for the White House

There’s a place for us
A time and place for us.
Hold my hand and we’ll be revealed here
Hold my hand as the paparazzi get near
Some day,

Meanwhile later on the republicans are hanging out where ever political bullies like to hang out. But the senate sub-committee members stop by and harass them with questions they do not answer. After they leave, the members start to get rambunctious and a role playing song begins:

Dear kindly stupid public
You gotta understand
We thought this was a republic
But it’s getting out of hand
Our neighbors all are sneaking in
Our allies all are weak
Golly Moses, naturally we sneak

McCain and Republicans:
Gee, ordinary public, we are all very upset
Our trust funds have all run out and we’re running up a debt
We promised all the oil men
We’d sway things their way
Holy water, it’s hard to get our way

Get our way!

Get our way, get our way
We must always get our way
Move along, sing our song, and believe in what we say

That’s an inspirational story

Lemme tell it to the world!

Tell it to the senate sub-committee

(they reassemble their role playing...)

Dear kindly senate sub-committee
Torture’s not a game
We have to detain everyone
We think has gone insane
Homeland Security
Is a necessary cause
Leapin’ lizards, this isn’t the land of Oz!

Bush (as Committee):
Yeah, right

Senate Committee, your thought process is marred
These republicans are saving lives
Let’s send over all the National Guard
Must I say this until I go horse
What we need to do is ‘Stay the Course’

Huckabee: Stay the course!

Stay the course, stay the course
We need to stay the course
It’s the best thing for our defense friends
If we just stay the course

Bush (as Committee):
In the opinion of this committee, you have complex problems to solve; you need to see a public relations man

So take him to see a public relations guy

(another role playing reschuffle occurs...)

The public thinks I’m a war monger
The democrats say I’m weak
My affair is hidden no longer
My wife thinks I’m a sneak
Huckabee’s too far to the right
Obama says that I am bad
Goodness gracious, no wonder I am mad

Cheney (as public relations guy):
Yes, as republicans you’re really a dismal lot
But stick to God and fear to win
It’s really all you’ve got

All I’ve got!

All you’ve got, all you’ve got
All you’ve got, got, got
It’s really all you got

Gee, those dirty rotten Democrats
Seem to have us on the ground
Time to call upon our secret weapon
And turn this thing around
Saved again while way out on a limb
For Nader will lose it for them once again

The scene fades. The next scene shows the Republicans hanging around at the ExxonMobile cafeteria waiting for a war council with the Democrats. In come the Democrats…

“You republicans have had your chance and look at the country now,” Obama threatens. Huckabee chimes back “Oh yeah, well we have God on our side, what have you got besides new taxes and a bunch of minority candidates?” The republicans break out in laughter. The democrats aren’t laughing.

Bush: “We propose a war. Let’s talk terms.”
Obama: “Seems the only thing your good at is starting war. Your war, your terms”
Bush: “Fists”
Obama “Rocks”
Bush: “Bricks”
Obama “Knives”

Right then McCain comes in late from seeing Hillary. There seems to be some stain on his clothing (will be investigated later).

McCain: “Guns, Grenades, Missiles, Thermo-nuclear warheads! You guys are a bunch of sissies. Everyone of us hates you and I hate everyone.”
Obama: “What’s your point McCain?”
McCain: “We meet and fight it out with whatever you’re comfortable using.”
Obama: “Deal. Place?”
McCain: “Afghanistan?”
Obama: “You bombed it to rubble. Oregon?”
McCain: “We’d ruin all the old growth we want to cut and sell. Iraq?”
Obama: “Democrats don’t like to travel abroad. How about under the freeway?”
McCain: “Deal. Midnight.”

The scene ends. Tune in to the finale, part four, tomorrow.


leelee said...

VE!! you continue to amaze me with this well done...


Ed said...

leelee - Thanks. Only one more part to the story. Then what will I do? Don't worry; I have lots of silly stuff up my sleeve.

leelee said...

oh I have no doubt! yay!


Unknown said...

I bow before the new King of Political Parody and Comedy. I am silenced by this, my Lord.

Serena said...

This is so damned moving that I'm teary-eyed. And they all sing and dance so well! I had no idea that McCain could move so fast, or that Hillary could hit those high notes. I can't wait for the finale.:)

RED MOJO said...

This is my favorite part so far. Ohmigod, your songs are funny! I'm loving this!

United Studies said...

SNL doesn't have anything on you!

I am Arizona; a person, not a place. said...

Hillary looks so purdy in that dress.

Schmoop said...

Ha...That's effin funny. And that pic of Ron Paul makes me laugh every damn time I look at it. Cheers!!

Jeff and Charli Lee said...

When can we expect the soundtrack?

Memarie Lane said...

It's so scary how good those two look together.

Ed said...

kan - Thanks. It was fun to try this.

sj - I had no idea they could hit those high notes either!

red mojo - This was my favorite part too

jacki - Except a lot more money!

arizona - She feel purdy in it too!

matt-man - Yeah, I thought that was a good one of him

jeff - Soon as I can hire somebody that can actually sing to overdub all the voices.

maria - Yeah, I thought that one really looked a bit too natural...

Kurt said...

I was out of town and unfortunately I missed this post.