Monday, May 12, 2008

Seize the Opportunities

If you want to be successful and make a boatload of cash then you have to be quick and observe the opportunities that come along.

For example, I quickly noticed that with the incredible high price of gas there is a whole market segment out there that suddenly can’t quite afford to drive to places of a medium distance but also cannot afford any other means of transportation because they still need their vehicle for small things when they arrive.

So by quickly adapting a fleet of beat up vans and converting them to use that new compressed air technology I was able to significantly reduce the cost of transportation down to almost nothing and at the same time offer them a more reasonable cost option.

You can see here one of our vans delivering our customer and his car to his destination.

Cost cutting did also include eliminating proper care of the person’s vehicle and they do sign a waiver before they realize what is about to occur…

Like I said, you have to be fast to snag opportunities. This gig will only last a short while and then it’s off to an extradition free country for awhile…

28 comments:

Marie said...

That's quite a service you're performing. Are you going to franchise?

VE said...

marie - I'm looking into that. As long as I can receive my franchise cut in my extradition free country without it being seized...

Sornie said...

Cut me in on some of this action. Have you seen any vans suitable for transport of a Chevy Yukon?

VE said...

sornie. The bigger vehicles we just drag behind the van. Hey...we do put an old carpet down to protect it a little bit...

Kurt said...

You might want to put a lift kit on that suspension.

VE said...

kurt - That costs money and we're keeping costs down. Besides, the vans won't last long enough to warrant it as we'll be in our extradition free country just prior to their total breakdown.

Bee said...

First thought that came into my head:
"I bet the inside of that van smells like gasoline and urine"

No, I've never been in there.

Maureen said...

Well, I've seen crazier ideas make millions.

Good luck...

VE said...

bee - You've done this gig before, haven't you? You're already back under an assumed name, aren't you?

marie - Yeah...like Dancing with the Stars

VE said...

maureen - It must be Monday...I just called you Marie! See, you've already got an alias for your franchise

Matt-Man said...

Ha. I have nothing funny to say. I can't top that. Cheers!!

VE said...

matt-man - You don't need to. Your post today was equally funny!

Beth said...

Brilliant plan. Not quite along the lines of Microsoft, Google, etc. but nevertheless, brilliant.
(Perhaps a little risky, though.)

VE said...

beth - Yeah, but I don't want to have to build all those buildings and have to give speeches about my billions like those that started Microsoft and Google. I'd rather just screw the population and take the money and run...it's the American dream.

Jacki said...

Hey, if people can franchise "pooper-scooper" business, then you've got it made.

VE said...

jacki - Yeah...what a shitty franchise to be in. Mine is more distasteful and unscrupulous but less smelly.

Serena Joy said...

Carpe diem! But not the carp. That looks like a pretty good service you've got going. I'd use it. Which countries are they, now, with no extradition treaties?:)

VE said...

sj - I'm thinking Cape Verde, I've been there before (Islands off of Africa), Maldives or Mali...

G-Man said...

I need a vehicle that runs on methane gas...
I LOVE Mexican food!!
;-)

ELASTICWAISTBANDLADY said...

You could take the number one spot at humor-blogs with this kind of genius...oh, and if you actually signed your blog up over there.

ELASTICWAISTBANDLADY said...

I'm thinking of starting a small rickshaw service around here. I'll sign up my fellow fatties for rickshaw duty and tell them it's the newest weight loss sytem as I watch them slim down while my profits fatten up.

VE said...

g-man - That would save a lot of money?

elastic - Well...if humor blogs had anything to do with content I might consider adding it but since it's really just a popularity contest...nah. I feel quite happy with my stats and comments earned by those that want to visit; those that were referred or that I had visited first. Everyone can attest that though my blog roll is long...I do visit; and usually often.

Theresa said...

That picture makes me feel claustrophobic

colbymarshall said...

pure brilliance at work. I applaud you.

MJ said...

True.

And if you don't mind having to flee to Mexico every now and again, my cop boyfriend tells me selling cocaine is a pretty lucrative business as well... just don't be your own best customer.

Enjoying your blog.

VE said...

theresa - Don't worry, the customer never has to ride in the back

colby - Why thank you!

mj - Oh now see...that would be illegal! I'm just purporting unethical management of customer property through misleading waivers. Nothing blatantly illegal. See how I feel better already? Ha ha

leelee said...

REMARKABLE!

VE said...

leelee - But after you get done using my business...not re-drivable...