Friday, October 24, 2008

Making Google Smarter

You know how if you are using Google Search but it doesn’t know what you are asking about so it infers what you might be asking about and asks you “Did you Mean….?” and then gives you it’s best guess as a query result.

Well I think Google can do more. I think it needs to read between the lines. I think it needs to tell us the real scoop. I think it needs to add a little bit of sarcastic humor to these inferences.

Here are examples of what I’m talking about (you might have to click on them to really see)…










42 comments:

Jeff said...

When you input View From The Cloud it comes up with, Did you mean: best blog ever written. I think I like this new search capability!

The Incredible Woody said...

I won't begin to go into what comes up when you input The Incredible Woody...

AngieSS said...

:D After seeing your results, I totally agree with you. If Google could read between the lines, it would make life so much funnier!

eve cleveland said...

ve,
That sure would be helpful! I got the mean version of google and mine says..."YOU MEAN (FILL IN BLANK), F@CKTARD?" I'm skeered to ax it anything.
Eve

Jacki said...

Those are hilarious! I especially like the AIG one. Did you read where Merril Lynch's CEO is "retiring" with that outrageous sum of money?

And yes, Peter actually corrects me all the time...telling me it was the Vikings that first discovered North American, not Chris.

VE said...

jeff - Odd, when I looked up your blog it said "Do You Mean Mullet Champion of 1987?" ;)

incredible woody - Ha ha. Yeah...and do that search with Google images! You could get fired if you do it at work...

angiess - Mine keeps coming up with "Do you mean slacker?"

eve - Ha ha. You must have the Don Rickles edition of it...

jacki - I don't know how they can 'get away' with that. They should have to give the money back. Peter was right. My blogger friend Kanrei had a nice post on it the other day...it actually inspired this idea.

EmmaK said...

oh, my search engine Emmabot already does this. I typed in Sarah Palin and it asked: did you mean 'Jesus freak who believes in creationism?' Amazing!

VE said...

emmak - Ha ha. Yes, I'll bet there are quite a few interesting web sites that Emmabot would pull up on many things. I'd hate to think what it would find using me...

Carla said...

So when is this version coming out? How did you get your hands on it?

Kurt said...

I always love your graphics.

Tina said...

Haha. Great pictures. I found a post on sarcastic humor earlier this afternoon and I thought I'd share. I think it's right up your alley!

Sharon said...

Those are great!

Kanrei said...

Those are awesome! Remember "Miserable Failure"? Long ago, if you typed in "Miserable Failure" in Google and hit "I Feel Lucky," you got GWB's Homepage.

VE said...

carla - Cause I'm special! Well that's what all my teachers back in school told me...

kurt - I like visuals because I just assume people are as lazy as I am and don't want to read all my drivel. My last few posts have been waaaaay too wordy.

tina - I shall stop by and check it out.

sharon - Thanks.

Anne said...

these are cute!

MJ said...

Haha! Very good! That would be pretty helpful...

VE said...

kan - This post idea started from you. I was reading your post on Columbus day and came up with the idea. Now that you mention the "miserable failure" I do remember that one. I've been on Google since 1997.

VE said...

anne - Cute? Like ponies and rainbows and cuddly teddy bears? You're killin' my reputation Anne. You're supposed to say those are cutting edge funny! You spewed on the boss! You threw up a lung! Ok, maybe no vomiting...ha ha

mj - Imagine what would happen if you typed in each of the candidates!

ChrisEldin said...

I literally laughed out loud at these!
Except for the last one. I've never heard of Ericson, and now I need to really use Google and see if it bumps me back to Columbus.

ReformingGeek said...

I love it! I wonder if you type in Michael Jackson again if it will result in Diana Ross?

Shrinky said...

Freak off, I'm busy, I feel the fortune in the making coming on here.. and no, of course you didn't give me the idea for it, sheesh - where's the copywrite, huh???

(Evil raised eyebrow)

Roy Scribner said...

I Googled "half day" and it came back "did you mean 4 hours?"

VE said...

chris - Ha ha...an inverse reference. Who knows?

reforminggeek - I'm sure it would happen. If you look up Janet Jackson you'll get the same exact query results too.

shrinky - Ha ha. You know...if you peruse through my archives you'll find a bazillion money making schemes I should have copywrited. I just hope those stealing millionaires think of me at some point because that pallet of money hasn't fallen from the sky into my backyard like I keep hoping it will.

GC (God's Child) said...

this is just great

VE said...

gc - And fun. I'm all about the useless you know!

Megan said...

Fabulous!

Serena said...

That must be why when I look up Serena, I get results for fashionable straitjackets. Go, Google!:-)

VE said...

megan - And fantastical!

serena - Yeah...I told them a few things about you ;)

Uncivil said...

Haha, That was a good one VE

How about googling "Clint Eastwood"

and hit "I'm feeling lucky" and then it takes you to the page that says

Did you mean: "Do you feel lucky? Well do ya punk?"

colbymarshall said...

LOL at Cosmetic Surgery Disasters. Now, what about typing in Tom Cruise and getting "did you mean crazy psychopath?" Oh, wait...that's kind of already what happens.

VE said...

uncivil - Wow, I never knew that. Sweet!

colby - I'm afraid to type in Tom Cruise...what if I suddenly become one of them!

Anette said...

my creative hero!

Dale said...

You're brillianter than Google!

Uncivil said...

VE
I was just just joking around with that statement about Clint Eastwood.
But I put "Clint Eastwood I'm feeling lucky" in the google search bar and clicked the "I'm feeling lucky" button and it took me here?

http://google.about.com/od/searchingtheweb/qt/imfeelingluckyq.htm

Quickroute said...

I reckonyou should work for google but maybe you already do!

VE said...

anette - Why thank you dearie!

dale - Well...maybe funnier

uncivil - Ah, you got me on that. Interesting though

quickroute - Oh no, that would be working for THE MAN!

leelee said...

VE those are great....you work for google don't you!

HUGS!

VE said...

leelee - Ha ha. A couple people asked me that. I don't even think there are Google employees in Portland. And that would be such...well...work! ha ha

Alex L said...

Jacki- Well to be really correct you can tell Peter the native americans...

I'm pretty sure the vikings made it down to oz before Cook did aswell. Of course they were beaten by the aboriginals.

Matt-Man said...

HA. Good stuff. Cheers!!

Dee said...

my favorite is the last one!

Maureen said...

VE you never fail to astound me with the things you come up with... including the awesome graphics.