Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Yes Rudolph Works More than Once a Year

Ok, I lied. I said I was going to revisit Rudolph last week and obviously that didn’t happen. I know some of you were concerned about him being picked on and the threat of reindeer suicide. And while reindeer suicide is a serious problem what with all the pressures of mammal flight and the less than desirable weather and such fear not with Rudolph. I’ve managed to track down some of his other jobs and benefits. He’s doing quite well actually.

First of all, much of the year he has a night job running a light house. It’s quite economical as it doesn’t require any electricity and ships can see it for miles. It’s another thankless service only he can provide


Now he does split that gig up with a much more pleasing gig over in Amsterdam. That’s right, he’s responsible for the red light district. It gives him a wonderful European home to illuminate without irritation. In fact, it’s quite welcome!


Sure, even Rudolph needs to power down for some R&R in the summer. He keeps his vacation destinations quite secret. You never know where Cheney might be with his rifle so it’s usually pretty remote too. But VE investigators did manage to track down this rare sighting of Rudolph.


Yeah…he wasn’t too happy about the uninvited encounter either. I told the VE investigator that the antler gore heals up faster than he might think and there actually are things more painful (I just couldn’t think of any).

27 comments:

Roy Scribner said...

That bottom picture is how I looked last night, when I had to sit through this show for the 3rd time in a week. That little Clarice dow is starting to grow on me, though.

Memarie Lane said...

Didn't they shut down the red light district? Or something?

Megan said...

Rudolph looks really pissed.

ReformingGeek said...

Thanks for spilling the beans on what Rudolph is really up to. I'm glad the lighted nose has come in handy for him.

I wonder if that lighthouse is offering red light district services..

leelee said...

I have a Reindeer Post today too!!!


kewl!


HUGS!

VE said...

roy - Yes, too many times and these shows lose their luster FAST! I got burned out on Its' a Wonderful Life about 10 years ago due to overplay. Watch out for Clairese...she took Rudolph for everything he had!

marie - Naaah. Why would they do that? They make a fortune on that as a tourist destination. Most people just go to check it out and take pictures.

megan - Wouldn't you be if you had my gnomes sneaking around trying to take your picture?

reforminggeek - They probably do...and the sailors can watch from miles away!

leelee - Yeah...reindeer. I stop on by.

Nessa said...

Your picture of the day looks like Christmas at our house.

That's one pissed off looking deer.

Micky-T said...

Damn, that Rudolph looks like he wants to kick some reindeer ass.

VE said...

nessa - Glad to make you feel at home! ha ha

micky-t - Yeah, don't mess with trying to photo him while he's on vacation. He's nastier than Sean Penn!

Maureen said...

Holy crap, Rudy needs a happy pill... that last photo is hilarious!!!

The Self-Deprechaun said...

Rudolph is really pimpin' it. He's keeping the red lights on in that district so that all the commerce can go on all night long. That's some great staying power. I wonder what his secret is. Viagara for reindeers?

Serena said...

I think it's terrible that poor Rudolph has to work multiple jobs to make ends meet. This is reindeer abuse! Why is there no Santa union?:)

VE said...

maureen - It's tough to be a reindeer these days...

Self-Deprechaun - Maybe that's why all the other reindeer were jealous!

serena - It's a deer-eat-deer world out there...

Giggle Pixie said...

So THAT's who's behind the red light district! But wow, how sad that that is what he has been relegated to in his off time. No wonder he looks so angry.

Pfft.

VE said...

giggle pixie - A reindeers life is hard...somebodies always passing the buck.

Marvel Goose said...

Well there you go, a new product is born right here. Reindeer condoms.

Don't try and tell ME that Rudolf was like the Piano Player in the Bordello who claimed he didn't know what was going on.

I can see Amsterdam Eurotrash paying extra for the three way with the mammal with the four cloven-feet and the terminal case of rosacea nose.

Marvel Goose said...

I misspoke. I should have been more precise and said that he had a red lobulated nose.

Rudolf the Rednosed Reineer
had a red lobulated nose.
And if the English saw it
they would say the Celtic Curse Grows

Someone stop me before I post again

Kurt said...

I think he looks sleepy.

Jacki said...

From what I hear, he will be out of a job soon in Amsterdam. Seems that the Dutch government is going to clean up the Red Light District and move all the prostitutes and marijuana shops to some other district. That way they can make room for ritzy hotels, restaurants and stores. Who wants that?? I think it's charming the way it is!

Jacki said...

PS - No you cannot take pictures in the Red Light District. I've been there and tried that. As soon as I pulled out my camera, my friend told me to put it away, because all the pimps and drug lords will confiscate it. And they do!

Bee said...

Uh... I lost my comment after reading Marvel Goose and Jacki's comments.

BWAHAHAHA!!

Also, maybe Rudolph would smile a little more if he stopped picking his nose so much.

VE said...

marvel goose - Ha! You're officially on my writing staff! The pay is low but the benefits are non-existant...sounds enticing, huh? No wonder the gnomes give me a bad time...

kurt - You'd be sleepy too if you were up all night at the red light district!

jacki - That will take away Amsterdams character completely. Bummer. Oh, and that's odd about the camera. I was there and had no trouble. But it has been 8 years...

bee - Picking his nose? Is that the reason it's so red?

Jeff said...

Uh... I don't think your investigators mentioned that poor Rudolph is now playing his reindeer games in a ZOO!

VE said...

jeff - Shhhhh...he likes it referred to as the animal club...

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