Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Extreme Pranks

Whew! Back home from skiing. No, I didn't break anything. I did go down once and couldn't stop sliding down the run...went about 600 feet before a cat track stopped me. No pain though. Other than that...a good trip. Jacki asked if I visit blogs anymore. It's true...I've been terrible at getting over to your blogs what with vacation and a family emergency last week. I'll try to get out and leave my stoopid comments this week and get back into the blogging groove.

Meanwhile, let's get on to the funny...

VE investigators have uncovered another cutting edge trend going on right here in America: Extreme pranks

That’s right. In this age of ‘bigger and better’ pranksters are going above and beyond the call or normal childish bad taste.

“We’ve seen it coming. It’s gone from the simple format of Candid Camera to the elaborate schemes of Jackass. It’s gone from charades with friends to mult-billion dollar Ponzi scams with colleges,” quoted one prank detective (code named “Pratectives”).

The biggest new prank trend is the relocation of homes while their target is away. Yes, the childish upper-middle class men have had no proper family upbringing other than maids and servants and lots of disposable income. They have been relocating their friend’s homes in an effort to be funny and go over the top on the prank scale.


The cause of these childish acts is having a negative social impact on the upper middle class. Studies find that potential future victims are no longer leaving the home on elaborate self-absorbed vacations for fear of home relocation when they are gone.

Of course the new development of large Tupperware building containers that allow large homes and buildings to be relocated by helicopters is very disturbing. It essentially allows them to relocate even over a weekend away from their home. Essentially, they go away for a weekend of Mickey Mouse and return to find their home relocated to Death Valley…in July.

And home relocation, while at the peak of the extreme pranks, isn’t the only type of extreme pranks going on.

Rich people are hiring look-alikes to portray their celebrity friends and do embarrassing things that the media then thinks are the real celebrities. It might take years to build their self-absorbed worlds back again…

And then there is the case of people with too much money secretly converting their friends car to a monster vehicle when they're at their office…

44 comments:

Dee said...

i wish someone would move my house. wonder if that is covered under my insurance.

Quirkyloon said...

Amen Dee! I was thinking the same thing. Hey VE I want the prankster who will "take away" my old kitchen and leave in its place a new with new cabinets, stove, fridge....AND granite tops!

Come on...I promise I'll laugh!

LOL

Elizabeth said...

I agree! Some could prank me by putting my house on a barge and sending it down south where it's warmer!

I am Arizona; a person, not a place. said...

The first thing I thought was what Dee said: I wonder if that's covered under my insurance! If so, I wish someone would take my house away!

Giggle Pixie said...

That's hysterical!

Roy Scribner said...

Down here in Silicon Valley, my house gets relocated an inch or two everytime Mother Nature pranks us.

VE said...

dee - Nothings really covered under insurance...you should know that!

quirkyloon - There could be a lot of pranks like that, huh? Oh, darn, they took my 28 inch big tube TV and replaced it with that 60 inch wall mount TV. Darn pranksters....

elizabeth - Of course, if you go far enough South it just gets cold all over again...

arizona - I'll refer you to my comment for Dee...

giggle pixie - And I'm known for my hysteria...

roy - Mother nature...she's got the best prankish sense of humor! I salute her...

Bazza said...

That car's wheely good.

VE said...

bazza - Except if you live in a big city. Hard to park in parking garages...

The Incredible Woody said...

I am so glad you explained that. I just returned from a visit to my ski chalet in Vail but it was nowhere to be found!

Memarie Lane said...

shoot, i haven't been able to cruise the blogosphere in a week.

VE said...

incredible woody - That's a tragedy. You probably had to stay in one of those nasty 8 star hotels instead...

marie - Me neither. My father had open heart surgery last week and I had a ski trip. Only one of those events were planned and both of them make blogging difficult...

Jaime said...

Did somebody return home from skiing to find his house missing?

Sarah said...

Reminds me of the pranks we used to pull on each other in college. Sneak into a suitemate's room and switch everything from one person's side of the room to the other. For example: Take all clothes out of person A's closet and but them in B's closet, switch their bedding, book shelf, etc. It takes a moment for them to realize what happened when they walk in. Nothing is missing but everything is in the wrong place.

Kurt said...

I wish I had house. Or a car.

Serena said...

In some neighborhoods, residents would PAY to have this prank performed.:)

Uncivil said...

Hey....somebody just relocated my president?

Gladys said...

Gosh and I thought I was clever when I put Saran Wrap over the toilet before my husbands' morning constitutional.

I guess it's a good thing that most of the people around here have houses on wheels. Not so difficult to move. Now let's see about making those broken down vehicles on blocks in their yard vanish.

Beth said...

How do you come up with this stuff??!! I'm still smiling.
Good to hear no broken bones on your vacation. Some bruises?

Quickroute said...

I heard of mobile homes but this takes the biscuit

VE said...

jamie - Damnit! Where'd you put it?

sarah - I used to love doing that one when I bothered to go to work. I still leave people's thing upside down when I visit their sad working areas...

kurt - You have a zine...and it's enough!

serena - Hmmmm...if only I were ambitious....

uncivil - Ha! This is a politic-free zone...

gladys - Those vehicles are tied down to the very core of the earth and cannot be moved...

beth - I really don't bruise. Nope, not even a pain. I didn't even get overly drunk with the boys. I didn't even get picked up at the bars (the wifey-poo is happy about that).

quickroute - Even Fed Ex can't handle those requests...

teeni said...

HA! I wish I had some rich friends who would relocate my home for me to a new more tropical locale. Also, my car could stand an upgrade like the one pictured in your post. ;)

angie said...

If someone would just bring me my old house in Oregon here, I'd really appreciate it.

lime said...

shucks, it's a whole lot easier for those of us in mobile homes to begin with!

leelee said...

How can I protect myself?...I really like where I live..

*worried*


HUGS!

Queen Goob said...

What did they do....duct tape the tires on there?

~Babs said...

My kitchen floor is being jackhammerd up tomorrow to get to a broken sewer line. Trust The VE when he says nothing is covered under insurance. And we just had new tile installed. Waaaaaa, whine,,,,.
Yeah,,,I'm almost ready for somebody to prank it away and I'll applaud!

The Self-Deprechaun said...

I know how these pranks go. You go to the store for milk and when you come home to use your garage opener, poof! no garage, no home. Those crazy kids.

that's why one has to have a portable bunker. remember i told you about them?

www.usbunkers.com

colbymarshall said...

If anyone ever moves my house while I'm out of town, I will take my newly converted monster-car and run them over!!

Bee said...

I need my house moved to higher ground. Maybe I'll prank myself.

Megan said...

This makes a mortgage person like me very upset. Very, very upset. And I've already been upset for about four years now...

Alex L said...

The local dump... looks like it might be a nicer neighborhood though.

VE said...

teeni - It's never the location you want. They'd probably put it in the middle of Greenland...

angie - Of course they're far too roomy for Southern CA. A PODS box should fit the typical space requirements of there...

lime - They move those too when you're in the grocery store. Usually put them in the mall or something obnoxious...

leelee - Avoid contact with rich people...

queen goob - That would be too easy to remove. I'm sure they had a metal fabricator on location...

babs - You'll probably end up having to go all the way down to the foundation to fix properly. Same effect as the moving house prank...

self-deprechaun - I see you are properly prepared. Good job!

colby - I like the improvisation. Can I shoot the video when you do. I want to put it on Anger TV...

bee - The key there is to trick your rich friends into THINKING they're fooling you and then have them do it for you.

megan - Relax, relax. You can still charge for the land...

alex - Yes, in some situations that might be true...but it's still such a hassle changing all the mail etc.

Carla said...

Just the title, "Extreme Pranks," had me. Do you think they could go too far?

Anne said...

i'm glad you came back "whole" from skiing...

that last pic, looks like those tires are taped on to the car!

VE said...

carla - Somehow they'll find a way to go further...

anne - Yeah, it does. I have no idea...I just find the pics...

Starrlight said...

Can we put in requests for our offices to be moved?

VE said...

starrlight - Like moved far away but without you (even though they still pay you). Like that? Or just moved to the South of France across from the nude beach kind?

Starrlight said...

Damn, my Greek work ethic is forcing me to choose the South of France nude beach while I still work option. Frankly I'd lose my mind without a job. I get twitchy working only 40 hours a week!

VE said...

starrlight - Ok then, nude French beach it is! Just watch those winter months...

unfinishedrambler said...

Actually I like the last photo and wouldn't mind that if it happened to our car: a crappy Saturn. Can you hook that up? We live in redneck country anyway. No one would notice. They'd probably think it was cool.

BlondeBlogger said...

The ultimate "pimp my ride!"

Janna said...

Y'know, with all the ice and snow we've had this year, it might be helpful to have those huge frickin' tires on my car.
I'd need a mini flight of stairs just to get into the driver's seat, but hey, maybe the pranksters will include that as part of the package.

VE said...

unfinishedrambler - Does insurance cover you if your car actually returns to the planet Saturn?

blondeblogger - Yes, a lot of pimps are moving to large tractor tires now...

janna - Yes, the prank comes with your own escalator...