Friday, August 21, 2009

Adapting from the Stone Age

The trouble with back in the post-stone age was that they hadn’t invented coat hangers or mannequins yet. This created quite the dilemma for high society wanna-be’s that would have all of the latest animal skin outfits. Even back then there were the rich and the poor. The rich simply hired the poor to stand in their closets all day and night and act like an outfit hanger. They’d stand there until an outfit was needed and if their outfit was being worn for the night; they’d get a rare night off. The poor, well, that’s what kids were for, right?

But times change and evolution moves on; coat hangers and mannequins got invented and these kinds of people had to adapt. They had honed their skills of doing nothing by not ever moving into a fine craft and needed other avenues to apply them.

Some went into the entertainment sector.

Some went into the armed forces

And some when into the corporate world

47 comments:

moooooog35 said...

..and some went on to a fruitful job doing commercials for Old Navy.

BURN THEM!!! BUUUURRRNN THEMMMM!!

Ahem.

Sorry.

Chris Eldin said...

AHAHAHAH! The last one caught me off guard!
And thanks for the idea about having kids holding the clothes. I *am* spending way too much on hangers!
:-)

subtorp77 said...

I hated when I had to stand at attention( even worse if you had to hold a salute, wot ? ) Ooh, you should edit in a pic from the guards at Buckingham Palace!

Gladys said...

What about sewing dummies? How did they evolve?

Roy Scribner said...

So that's why my kids won't hang-up their clothes!

Quirkyloon said...

Ah! At last a picture of VE at work. Does that "pose" get your blogging juices flowing?

I'm gonna have to try it, when I am bone dry!

BTW VE? Sideburns are soooo yesterday!

hee hee hee

Kurt said...

I'm lost.

VE said...

moooooog35 - That's good advice! Unfortunately there's no smoking within 10 feet of anything. You'll have to take them out to an open field to do it...

VE said...

chris - It used to be a coveted occupation...

VE said...

subtorp77 - Yeah, I thought about the guards but went with that guy at the tomb of the unknown soldier.

VE said...

gladys - Sewing dummies? What's a word for the opposite of an oxy-moron because whatever it is; that's one!

VE said...

roy - Funny where the true sources of things are found...

VE said...

quirkyloon - Ha! Nice try. But you made seven mistakes:

1. VE doesn't work
2. VE NEVER wears a tie
3. VE doesn't own pink
4. VE would slouch at the computer
5. VE never tucks in his shirt
6. VE would never part his hair at the side
7. VE would never actually write something with that pen

VE said...

kurt - You can ask any one of those guys for directions... they're not going anywhere

Megan said...

I read how Queen Elizabeth (the first one) used to get mad if her ladies-in-waiting had fancier clothes on than she did. So she'd make them change, and give her the nice stuff...

I know, not really on topic. But kinda.

Mrsupole said...

So, are you saying that all those people standing in my closet can be replaced by something called a hanger. I thought a "hanger" was the guy who hung people back in the old west.

I call these people "closetteers". I even let them take breaks and feed them 3 square meals a day. What more can they ask for. And no way am I gonna change the TV channel for them. If the History Channel is good enough for my hubby then it is good enough for them.

I like your list to quirkyloon, expecialy about how you do not work. Hehe.

Oh all right, we know you must "work" a little, but it is fun to 'pretend' the government is giving us everything for free. Oh yeah, they do that for theirselves already. And are those the rich ones, the ones that we pay a lot of money to, while they do nothing but take even more of our money, so they can take all those fancy trips on our dime and then yell at us. And we have to protect these idiots with our military. What a waste.

Dang it VE, when are you gonna run for one of these positions. I would vote for you. I'd rather you have my tax money then them. At least you provide some entertainment.

Sigh.

Elizabeth said...

You mean the clothes don't have to just lie on the floor? They can hang in the closet?? I'll have to introduce the concept to my husband.

Ronda Laveen said...

I can't stay too long. I need to brush up my resume to send to Mrsupole. Being one of her closeteers looks like a pretty good gig.

Baino said...

DOH that's me sorted then. Spend my whole day staring at a screen with sticky notes on it. I'm as useful as a telephone hygienist and less useful than an accountant.

Janna said...

The best part about being a statue is that whenever you farted, people would assume it was the tourist standing next to you.

subtorp77 said...

VE, good choice but I never did see all the need for the dog and pony show...

The Incredible Woody said...

I enjoy trying to make statue people move!

ReformingGeek said...

I'm currently clearing space in my closet. I think I may have room for one of those clothes holder thingies.

Maureen said...

Ha! Reminds me of walking past Old Navy at the Mall of America a few days back... one of their clerks was posing in with their mannequins... scared the crap outta me when she moved.

Uncivil said...

My brain is really scrambled now?

VE said...

megan - I guess its good to be queen!

VE said...

mrsupole - Closetteers? Are those like musketteers or mouseketeers? Oh, and no...I really DON'T work. Life's more simple that way...

VE said...

elizabeth - Ha! I hang nearly everything...folding or ironing is just ridiculous!

VE said...

ronda - It does sound appealing except that it's still considered work...VE cannot abide...

VE said...

baino - Ha! I once had a telephone hygenist. Cleaned my cell phone...

VE said...

janna - The gnomes approve highly of your idea there. You can come to their annual picnic...it's an honor to be invited.

VE said...

subtorp77 - It was a lot of formality for some guy they don't even know...sheesh...

VE said...

incredible woody - I do that trick too. They don't like it when I stack kindling and paper around their feet...

VE said...

reforminggeek - Male one, right? Young, buff, ample stuff...right? I suspected as much...

VE said...

maureen - I once hid out all day in this lame ride in San Francisco scaring people with a friend. It was great fun

VE said...

uncivil - It is...but don't wear pink shirts either.

Alex L said...

Those statue people are strange... how can you think that you deserve money for doing nothing. Isn't that what social security is for...

subtorp77 said...

VE, ah yes! Always nice to see where my tax dollar$ are going...

@Alex L, Social Security is the result of people that did work, at one time. You're thinkin' of welfare see VE's post on the University of Phoenix, it'll explain a lot...

Uncivil said...

And some "WHEN" into the corporate world?????
With a pink shirt at that!

lynn said...

is this true? welli read it on the interweb, it must be! :-)

Dee said...

where do you thunk these things up ?

VE said...

alex - Actually, it looks like too much damn work to stand around motionless all day long. No thanks...

subtorp77 - I know...that guy should be out killing somebody in some other country...

uncivil - Are you suggesting my proof reading is lacking? Its not that it's lacking, its just that it isn't there to begin with!

lynn - My gnomes claim so...but they're all pranksters.

dee - Usually from a comfy reclining chair...

Jaime said...

the corporate guy looks like how i felt on friday at the office. so glad it's the weekend.

VE said...

jaime - He looks like he's hoping to get sucked into the monitor to a land of fun and joyousness, but alas, it's just a spreadsheet...

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

Silly me....I thought floors were invented to hold clothes.

VE said...

perpetual chocoholic - No silly...those are there to give you something to fall on upstairs so you don't fall to your death...

Carla said...

Lol. That last guy looks like the least productive of the lot.