Remember our last adventures with the public relations person? You can review here
That seemed pretty incredible. Let’s visit another incredible scenario. Even the most famous song writers struggle from time to time; well, perhaps not Dylan, but most.
The scene is 1966 and Paul Simon is under intense pressure to put out a hit song. He gets referred to the public relation man for assistance…
Paul: Here’s the song, it’s called Scarborough Fair.
PR Man: You realize that’s a folk song hundreds of years old, don’t you?
Paul: Yeah, but most people don’t. I added a bit here and cut out a lot there…
PR Man: You realize most people don’t know where
Paul: It adds to the mystery of the 60s.
PR Man: Ok, we’ll go with that. Let’s see the first part of lyrics:
Are you goin to scarborough fair?
parsley, paprika, sage, dill weed, corainder, rosemary, ginger and thyme
Remember me to one who lives there, she once was a true love of mine
PR Man: Whoa, I see you’ve added a whole lot of spices in there and throughout each verse.
Paul: Hey, I didn’t write the original and I don’t have the time to replace those lines so I added to it a bit. You must realize...more of my hair is falling out every single day. I’ve only got so much time to attract the ladies until I get famous.
PR Man: I mean really, Paul, dill weed? Maybe you should lay off the weed…
Paul: Ok, so we drop the dill weed.
PR Man: Do you even know what they use corainder for?
Paul: No, but it sounds cool
PR Man: It’s a garnish for chutney. Do you even know what Chutney is?
Paul: No, but it sounds very English and The Beatles are English so it can’t hurt.
PR Man: It does, remove it. Now what about Ginger?
Paul: I knew a girl named Ginger back when I had more hair.
PR Man: So does everybody. She’s on Gilligan’s
Paul: Perhaps not. I’ll remove it.
PR Man: Good. Let’s see, I’m thinking paprika isn’t rolling off the tongue well. Reminds me of pap smear and that's probably not a good musical focus.
Paul: Errr…ok, gone. Hey, wait, it’s back to the original Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme.
PR Man: Never mess with a classic. I suggest you name the album the same. Classics are classic. There’s also a bunch of crap lyrical references in here that nobody will relate to.
Paul: Like what?
PR Man: Well, cambric shirt. Polo shirt: maybe. Cambric: doubtful. Then there’s the reference to a sickle of leather. You’re gonna piss off the sickle cell anemia society. Let me hear you sing the song though.
Paul sings the song
PR Man: Excellent. Just as I thought; nobody’s going to understand the lyrics anyway. They’ll make up their own replacement for those words. I think we’re done here. I’ll forward this song along to a colleague of mine shooting a little comedy called “The Graduate.” Though your songs have no tie to the theme of the movie, he needs some songs nonetheless. It might help your career. You can leave your check on your way out.