THESE are the presents you should have gotten everybody

Every year I do a post on what presents you should get everyone for the year. This year I'm so late that I have to rub it in and just say "you should have given them this..."

First of all, I recruited some of my fellow humor bloggers to suggest presents for me. Here are their suggestions:

From nonamedufus we have one of my favorite because it looks like you can put Cocoa Puffs in this one...


Next we have one from freaksmack. This would have been a great gift for all those "green" people on your list...

Finally we have reforminggeek suggesting this wonderful set of garden decor figures. Either that or they are elaborate straws for my fruity rum drinks...

And I've done some shopping of my own. Here's what I came up with:

Now everyone would want these wonderful ice cube trays. They're great to confuse the grandparents when they look for their dentures in the morning...

Oh, and if you didn't buy my Sharper Image gift cards, you can still get those that don't deserve a present something. Give them the gift of nothing!

Lighting is big on my list this year. First up we have a Teddy Bear lamp...because you cannot deny a Teddy Bear...even when he's headless and has a light bulb stuck down his neck!

Oh, and speaking of lighting solutions, who wouldn't want this alien abduction lamp?

On the jewelry front, I found this wonderful pair of enema earrings. How clean is that design, ladies?

Do you have a computer geek in need of a gift? You should get them this techno-wate Xmas tree? It's the latest in the "what do we do with all these old computer parts" genre...

Oh...and if you didn't go for the Teddy Bear light or the Alien Abduction light...you probably think you're too smart for those. Well then...here's a brain lamp for you...

Remember the Pet Rock? Remember watching "Office Space" and that "Jump to Conclusions" mat? Well, here's another product about as dumb as those. It's an actual piece of wood to allow you to "knock on wood" should you find yourself surrounded by plastic when you need to resort to your superstition ways...

Every office worker should have a pole dancer on their desk. Try to be the last employee that hasn't had to go speak with Human Resources for having one...

And finally...all the way from Russia we have this wonderful fish necklace. Who said imports weren't unique anymore...

And with this post, I'll wish all my readers happy holidays. I won't be posting again until Monday the 28th as I relax and enjoy my own holiday fun. Who knows what VE might get for Christmas this year. He's been exceptionally naughty. See you next week!