Friday, February 12, 2010

The Incident - A Flash 55 Friday

“Ok, put your hands behind your back, no sudden moves and drop to the floor” says the policeman having rushed in on the violation call…

What I wish would happen to the guy with 22 items in front of me in the 15 items or less line as my lunch purchase of JoJos grow cold…

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A Flash 55 is a story written using exactly 55 words.
Visit Mr. Knowitall to read other Flash 55 entries this week.

38 comments:

Mrsupole said...

Does it count if all 15 are of the same item, and what if that one pkg has 15 things in it. No wonder people get in the wrong line, they can't read.

God Bless.

15 and leaving second open now.

Brian Miller said...

how did i know i would be second....lol. i have often shared this feeling. nice 55.

my 55 is up!

monica said...

allrighty
and are you really so polite you keep it in?
or was it just a story story?

subby said...

Cold Jo-Jos...eeeewww! Somehow they just aren't right once you reheat them...I know I'm correct in this, yes?

subby said...

@ Mrsupole...George Carlin once put it as "Six packs of franks...one item!" HA!

Nessa said...

I've always fantasied about being able to use my own gun to shoot other shoppers.

Flash 55 - Priorities

Flash 55 - So Sorry

CatLadyLarew said...

Damn people who can't count!

Of course, what I really hate is when the store supervisor directs me to the express line because there's nobody there and then a bunch of people come up behind me and think I'm the slob who can't read.

Uncivil said...

What I hate is when they have 15 registers and only two of them open?
I'll go fill up a cart with groceries pull it up to the long line at one of the two registers. Leave it sitting right there and loudly exclaim to the cashier as I'm walking out, "If your manager can't hire someone to run these empty registers, then maybe he can hire someone to restock that cart full of groceries I just left standing back there!!!!?????"

g-man said...

Jo-Jo's?
Whatever place you shop, there are always people trying to snide the rules. Why are folks so inconsiderate? And why are they in such a hurry?
Excellent 55 VE...
Thanks for the Heads Up, and have a Kick Ass Week-End...G

secret agent woman said...

Or at the very lease, a manager to ask the to move to a regular line.

What in the world are JoJos?

Susan said...

What are JoJos?

I’m up right HERE

The Incredible Woody said...

I have the super-power of being able to pick the slowest line in the grocery store.

Quirkyloon said...

Yeah I wanna know to. What is a JoJo?

Roy Scribner said...

I actually had one of these moments on Monday! Guy blows by me during the commute on Monday, at 100+ (I'm doing 80 in the HOV, 'cause that's how I roll) and flies right by a police car, who is laying low in the slow lane.

Ah, Justice. She is the sweet elixir that rewards those adept at hiding their own transgressions, allowing the feeble-minded to incur her wrath, instead.

Gladys said...

I wonder would the Express Lane police be super speedy? Would the fashion police wear designer uniforms? These things keep me up at night.

Tall Kay said...

Awww...sweet justice in an unfair world! Great 55 which I'm sure we have all had experience.

Wondering what a jojo is too?

subby said...

Oh great! NOW I'm craving JoJos! Thanks VE! And we still have frosted bluberry pop-tarts, on the East Coast ;)

Got all th' fixin's for JoJos except...gaaaah! No fryer! I'll have to improvise, heh, heh...

aladdinsane12 said...

yeah, those bastards need to pay! can't they count?! :)

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

We only have 8 items or less, 10 items or less or 12 items or less lines up here. I guess Canadians don't like odd numbers.

ReformingGeek said...

I don't know what a JoJo is either.

I'm with CatLady and often I won't go to the express lane because it's too hard to bag your own stuff using your own bags.

Good job with the 55.

gab said...

there are some days I wish the stores have cops there to arrest those with more that the limit says. BUT with that said I also have to say when I worked Target as cashier in the lane with 10 or less if There was no one in site coming and all I was doing was standing around I would tell people waiting in a long line to come on down to my lane and I would help them. Of Course Then there would be 5 who now had to wait. But I aways made sure I told them why they were in that lane.

Monkey Man said...

YES! What a great fantasy in 55. My 55 is HERE.

JenJen said...

I don't think I can do this. I'm not clever or succinct enough.

Ronda Laveen said...

Oh, I so hear you on that one!

My 55 is up

Chris C said...

Damnit I missed a comment. I was going for the no-hitter!

Janna said...

I'm so glad I'm not the only person who has any clue what JoJo's are. :)

I agree that overloading the express lane should be a serious offense requiring a combination of prison time, expensive fines, and having to listen to Martha Stewart for three hours straight.

Plus everybody in line behind him should get to smack him repeatedly with the overabundance of items he chose. (Here's hoping he didn't select a wrench set or a bucket of paint!)

Repeat offenders can just be thrown into a den of pit bulls after receiving an enema of Alpo.

Thanks for doing Friday 55 yet again!
Mine's posted right here.

Elizabeth said...

Aren't JoJos big fat french fries??

Mrsupole said...

Hey does Subby know that he has moved into the number 1 spot now that Megan has gone on hiatus.

Congrats Subby.

And Uncivil that is just too funny but at the same time kinda uncivil. LOL

God bless again.

subby said...

@ Elizabeth~ close enough, heh, heh...but ad in some spicy batter :P Deep fried greasy goodness!

@Mrsupole~ I am? Be that as it may you lead in the comment race, wot? Heh...

VE said...

Mrsupole – Nice try…no that counts as 15! I’ve called the authorities…

Brian – It’s a common frustration…well…except for the soulless that take advantage of it…

Monica – I kept it in…but I’ll send the gnomes out to follow them and deal my revenge later…when they’re not suspecting…

Subby – That is correct…and cold Jo-Jo’s aren’t any better…

Nessa – Could be a new hunting fad…I think it will catch on…

Catladylarew – I have this happen all the time. I tell the people behind me that I’m special and perhaps in a future life they will be special too…

Uncivil – I like that. Do you get the items that are hard to figure out where they came from? You know…like Pigs Feet in a jar? Nobody knows where those are stocked…

g-man – Hurry up and die…that’s the way of things…

secret agent woman – It would be more fun if the manager had a whip and a gladiator outfit…oh, and jojos are really thick potato fries that are deep fried with spices…

susan – I’m afraid that’s on a need to know basis…oh, alright… jojos are really thick potato fries that are deep fried with spices…

incredible woody – Awesome. Do you wear your superhero costume in the store?

Quirkyloon - jojos are really thick potato fries that are deep fried with spices…

Roy – Being passed doing 80 and having a cop ignore you only happens in California and Germany!

Gladys – I believe the fashion police wear trendy fad outfits and sneak into the express lane with more items than allowed…

Tall kay - jojos are really thick potato fries that are deep fried with spices…

Subby – But I actually like the unfrosted Blueberry pop-tarts…which I can now only find in strawberry and so I whine!

Aladdinsane12 – I think we should count every one of them for them!

Perpetual chocoholic – That’s because America is odd!

Reforminggeek – I’d go to the express lane but I have all these fruits and vegetables that need a PHD to figure out how to price…

Gab – That’s how some of them get there and I’m ok with that…it’s the others that should be taken down and tortured…

Monkey man – I’m all about fantasy!

Jenjen – You can’t write 55! (done in your best Sammy Hagar voice…)

Ronda – I’ll get around…finally…I took a day off to go skiing…

Chris – Sorry about that, man. I even checked twice to see if I’d made a mistake…you’re still way up there and the year is a long one…

Janna - jojos are really thick potato fries that are deep fried with spices…oh, and I think they should have prison time with Martha Stewart…

Elizabeth – Well…somebody knows at least…

Mrsupole – I liked uncivil’s idea…I’m going to the store now and try it out!

Subby – At least you know what they are. I thought maybe it was a West Coast thing or something…

subby said...

VE, just about every grease shack round these parts makes Jo-Jos :P

And unfrosted blueberry? Yeah, we got that in stock! Lemme know if ya ever get a real hankerin' for 'em and I'll send some your way. Silly the way they market foods...then again blueberries are rather common over here :)

VE said...

subby - Dang...I might even take you up on that...

subby said...

VE, just don't tell the gnomes or they'll want some too...!

PattiKen said...

Isn't the penalty for this the same as that for the guy doing 40 in the outside lane of I-95?

Jaime said...

what the heck's a jojo?

Maureen said...

Ah! So know I know what the heck JoJos are. We call them Mo Jos!

The Silver Fox said...

Flash 55, eh? Maybe I should try those while my arm's so effed up.

VE said...

Subby – I know…they steal them!

Pattiken – It should be…I HATE slow drivers in the outside lane thinking they own the road…

Jaime – It’s a fig fat french fry!

Muareen – Ha! Well…you can call them Jo or you can call them Mo…

Silver fox – They’re a great participatory post when you don’t have a lot of anything else ready…