Tuesday, March 02, 2010

The Doctor and the Carpenter

Remember when it was generally thought that if you become a doctor, you’d have it made. You’d be a babe magnet.

But consider the carpenter/handyman. I think that in reality, these are the guys that women want. The clues are all over. He knows how to work with his tool! Why do you think they call a screw just that? Don’t forget about the nuts. Oh, and nobody can drill with such precision!

The Doctor? Forget him! There is nothing sexy about a waiting room. He’s not discriminate; hell, he’s just happy you have a pulse! And when is the last time you slept with anybody who required you to get weighed on the scale before proceeding? Oh, and incidentally, his anal probing is limited to only the same sex. You do your own decision making about that…

Come on…the carpenter has spent years playing and perfecting his wood! The doctor needs nursing…

Even the beginning carpenters are called layman. Beginning doctors don’t even have their own practice…

So, ladies, you tell me…do you want to be doing it with somebody that is worried about malpractice or somebody so suave they have to be "Bonded"?

36 comments:

The Blue Zoo said...

Who knew carpenters were so sexy?! I'll have to remember that if Im ever in need of a new hubby.

Mrsupole said...

Uh, you do make it hard to pick. Uh, I don't know.
Uh, let me see.

I think I will choose......

God bless.

PS...Maybe I will just try for second this month. This organizing sucks.

jinksy said...

This is not exactly the post I would have chosed to read today, as I'm booked in for a Colonoscopy this afternoon! LOL!

monica said...

well.. ahem.. a carpenter is truly so "handy" in many ways... so I wouldn't mind one, I guess.. my dearly beloved for 18 years now was a chef when I met him, all dressed up in a chef's uniform, tall hat and all...:o) and chefs know how to use their hands too... ( -blush-) not so good for one's waist line though... all that yummie gravy...

Baino said...

Ok. . .It's an affair with the Carpenter but marry the Doctor. Then really, what I need is a mechanic!

Collette said...

A carpenter just pounds & hammers away all the time until he gets it all the way in. He always nails it.
The only thing a doctor has going for him is his bedside manner.

Beth said...

So true. In my next life (because it ain’t gonna happen in this one) I’ve always said I’d like to hook up with a handyman. If he was independently wealthy, that would be a bonus - but not a deal breaker. I can bring in the big bucks on my own.
Or perhaps in my next life I should just hope to be able to master repair jobs on my own??

subby said...

Of course the doctor would be grateful you have a pul$$$$e, wot?

And um...I still do wood-working..ahem...nevermind...

lifeshighway said...

I'm sorry but I will have to go with the Doctor. The carpenter spends way too much time with his wood. The Doctor will have the income to supply me with all the pool boys I so deservedly need.

JenJen said...

I don't want the doctor investigating this or that on me...gimmie the carpenter.

The Incredible Woody said...

My Grandpa was a carpenter so I just can't go down that road.

Quirkyloon said...

Ay, yi, yi! What have you been drinking?

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

....asuming the doctor is a man. What if she's a woman.

Roy Scribner said...

Shaken, not stirred - that's my motto. How's that for "suave"?

Elizabeth said...

Ha Ha Ha! I like Baino's plan!

VE said...

Blue zoo – That’s good advice…

Mrsupole – Slip slidin’ away…oh well, you’re still in the perfect column…

Jinksy – Yes…very bad timing…sorry about that…

Monica – Aha…see, other talents are out there…and what’s not to like about gravy?

Baino – Sounds like you need a marem (male harem)…

Collette – Very true…

Beth – I know about your secret desire for a carpenter!

Subby – All men are wood workers at some level…

Lifeshighway – Doh! You can take him for all the money and then have fun with the carpenter…

Jenjen – There’s a woman that knows what she wants!

Incredible woody – Ooh…bad visuals…

Quirkyloon – Fruity rum drinks, of course!

Perpetual chocoholic – Don’t mess with my head now…

Roy – I agree…it’s tough to stir me to do anything…

Elizabeth – She’s gonna rule then…

Megan said...

"Doing it?"

Doing what? What are you talking about?

CatLadyLarew said...

Hmmmm.... both have their uses. But you do make the carpenter sound pretty appealing. Now, do you have either one available? I'm not too picky.

secret agent woman said...

Well, of course I wouldn't wan't doctor who was also a boy, like Doogie Howser. But I'm fairly handy myself so I don't need someone to do work around the house for me. Besides, surgeons are good with their hands.

aladdinsane12 said...

i was about to say "yeah, and indiana jones was one, too!" and then i realized he was an archaeologist. my brain isn't working today.

Tom said...

and we all know what Doogie grew up to be.

angie said...

This is a rhetorical question, right?

bon bon said...

my dad, brother, grandpa, uncles...all carpenters. dry wall, brad nails, saw dust. i grew up surrounded by that shit every day. nothing sexy about it.

but if you were to tell me to take off all my clothes, relax and just breathe deeply? well, something can be said for that.

ReformingGeek said...

Hubby is a "carpenter". I'm good.

Thanks.

;-)

Serena said...

I'll have a carpenter any day of the week.:)

VE said...

Megan – Work of course, why, what did YOU think?

Catladylarew – Sorry…I’m not a broker…I’m just the messenger…

Secret agent women – You obviously like a man in white…

Aladdinsane12 – Pretty close…Harrison Ford did carpentry work before his acting career took off…

Tom – We do? Older? I obviously need to watch more TV…

Angie – Of course…

Bon bon – I tell women that all the time…it never works UNLESS you are a doctor…

Reforminggeek – You got all, girl!

Serena – There’s lots to take care of!

gab said...

And beginning Doctors are called Practicing. Most offices call then PA's. Yep my dad was a carpenter Mr Gab has done carpenter work many times so I guess I go with a carpenter!!!! Gotta love em! New post today

The Silver Fox said...

Actually, all doctors are said to be "practicing" medicine. I'd rather take my clothes off for someone who's perfected their craft.

Janna said...

It depends...
Is he working with "hardwoods" or "soft woods?"

Just so it's not Tiger Woods.

subby said...

LMOA @ Janna's comment :D

Gladys said...

Hey I come from a long line of carpenters. I in fact am pretty good with wood myself. Not that I get wood well unless you count girl wood.

VE said...

Gab – I’m working on getting over to visit…I had to have my computer’s operating system reinstalled because it was having “issues”. I guess they get cluttered after time and eventually can’t operate anymore…just like doctors…

Silver fox – I agree…I’d rather have the perfect, not the practice before it…

Janna – Ha! Good one…

Subby – She’s quick…

Gladys – “I’m pretty good with wood myself”…music to a man’s ears…

Pranayama mama said...

carpenter, hands down.

Jaime said...

HA! i like a guy who's good with his hands, but it depends on the carpenter. i mean, if he's one of the big fat guys whose hairy ass hangs out of his pants every time he bends over, i'll take a doctor any day over that.

lime said...

carpenters need beltts for their tools too.

VE said...

pranayama - I'm guessing those hands are somewhere else...

jaime - I thought those were plumbers...

lime - Now that is impressive...