Sunday, May 23, 2010

Other things not to do while Driving

We all know not to drink while driving. And I’m sure by now you’ve heard about Oprah’s campaign to ban texting while driving. That makes sense; I can barely text at home while walking without stumbling over the kitchen table or that new TV from UPS that I stole off the neighbor’s porch.

But texting isn’t enough. I’m concerned about a great many things people are doing while driving that they know better than to do. Here are just a few that Oprah should add to her list:

- Making balloon animals
- Doing yo-yo tricks
- Trying to solve Rubik’s cube
- Looking for something healthy in the ingredients on your Hostess Ho-Ho’s package

These things are concerning!

Oh, and these new motorcyclists trying to sneak in a few winks while waiting for the green light and then oversleeping? Yeah…it’s pissing me off!


24 comments:

Cheryl said...

The countdown begins. Only 8 more after this. Can you maintain your integrity and sense of humor for 8 more days? I'll be watching. This could get interesting.

Roy said...

Driving and sleeping; yeah, that could be a problem!

The Incredible Woody said...

Saw a guy last week reading the newspaper while driving!

Collette said...

Making balloon animals would be a very bad thing while driving. I had enough problems with 17 helium ballons floating around in my car at one time. Then I had to parallel park...LOL!

CatLadyLarew said...

Luckily, I'm not writing this comment while driving.

Mrsupole said...

Well let's just say that getting a BJ while driving makes the driver a real jerk. And one see's so many women putting their make-up on while driving that one day I saw a guy holding up a sign that said, "Stop clowning around!". Let's just say he got a lot of fingers.

I have also seen women putting nail polish on while driving, I can barely put it on at all and so I am in awe of these women.

Texting while driving is for the kids, now adults they know how to make better use of their time.

God bless.

Tom said...

i once saw a guy driving with a dog on his head. probably giving directions, so all is well.

Elizabeth said...

Geeze, forget about texting, I have a hard time working the radio and driving at the same time!

Subby said...

I've actually seen a guy working a Rubik's cube whilst driving...! Then there was the mook with the unfolded map across the entire windscreen!!!

New York had the right idea when they totally banned cell-phone use in vehicles. I've had waaaaaaaay too many close er...calls, heh...

Subby said...

Other things I've seen folks doing while driving( and these weren't from the George Carlin school of "Things To Do To keep other People Alert" ):

Brushing teeth
Curling iron usage
Reading
Shaving( electric )
Eating and drinking while trying to steer
Using a squeegee for a windscreen wiper, in the rain!
PC( laptop )usage
Faxing( believe it! )
Playing Gameboy
S.A.'s ( email me on this if you dinna ken wot it is )
Balloon inflation( and not the one from the cop, mind you )
Atlas reading ( which goes along with the map thing )
Toaster oven usage( I'm not kidding! )

Just to name a few more. I mean, who's got time for texting?

Janna said...

Ingredients in Hostess Ho Ho's:
(Really)

Sugar, Enriched Bleached Wheat Flour (Flour, Barley Malt, Ferrous Sulfate (Iron), B Vitamins (Niacin, Thiamine Mononitrate 9B1), Riboflavin (B2), Folic Acid), Water, Partially Hydrogenated Vegetable and/or Animal Shortening (Contains one or more of: Soybean, Cottonseed, Canola, Coconut, Palm Kernel or Palm Oil, Beef Fat), Corn Syrup, Cocoa Processed with Alkali, Invert Sugar, Contains 2% or less of: Sweet Dairy Whey, Cocoa, Whole Eggs, Mono and Diglycerides, Cornstarch, Salt, Leavenings (Baking Soda, Sodium Acid Pyrophosphate, Monocalcium Phosphate), Soy Lecithin, Soy Protein Isolate, Polysorbate 60, Wheat Gluten, Natural and Artificial Flavors, Calcium and Sodium Caseinate, Calcium Sulfate, Sorbic Acid (To Retain Freshness).

Wait... just a minute...
I've got it!
One of the ingredients is water, which is so healthful we need it to stay alive.

Therefore, we would all be dead if it wasn't for Hostess Ho Ho's.

We should write and thank them.

Subby said...

@Janna; didn't we have a chat about "what's in water"? Just sayin'...

ReformingGeek said...

You said "Ho".

Twice.

While driving.

For shame.

The Silver Fox said...

Reading while driving is bad. But reading a 3-D comic book while driving is even worse, especially when approaching traffic signals.

Jaime said...

i'm not a fan of people who pull out the paper and start reading it at red lights. but the ones who start shaving amuse me.

Dennis the Vizsla said...

I wouldn't ride a motorcycle while wearing shoes like those.

Anne said...

Oh Look, isn't that so sweet, he took his shoes off to take a nap, no scuff marks on the seat there!

VE said...

Cheryl – It’s a challenge. Tell me if I’m full of it…

Roy – It’s a problem for mere mortals! Us immortals…it breaks the monotony…

Incredible woody – They still sell newspapers?

Collette – Now that would be a challenge. Do you keep the helium balloons in there to lighten the car and get better gas mileage? Good plan…

Catladylarew – Nice try…I’m right behind you trying to pass on the right through the bike lane…

Mrsupole – Ha! I have no comment on that first one…

Tom – Ha! Dogs are the new top hat of the times…

Elizabeth – I just let my ipod go on shuffle mode. All the songs on it I like and so I don’t have to worry about it…

Subby – Damn…you’ve seen it all. I’m guilty of the driving with your knees while you eat the oversized overjuiced hamburger…

Janna – Ha! Only you…of course, that now has me wondering just how much does a “sweet dairy whey”?

Subby – What is in water? I’m guessing more water…

Reforminggeek – Damn…one more and I would have gotten by…well, at least during Christmas…

Silver fox – Ha! Maybe they should have 3D red lights and signs…

Jaime – Don’t you think their car is full of hair? Ewwww (there…I gave my own ewww)

Dennis the vizsla – You wear crocs, don’t you? Admit it…

Anne – He’s got to keep something nice…

Roy Scribner said...

I say sleep-driving should be an integral part of driver education!

Perpetual Chocoholic said...

I think fighting kids in the backseat should be banned from cars. They probably cause more accidents than texting.

aladdinsane12 said...

Wait, you're saying NOT to make balloon animals?!? But what am I supposed to do at red lights then??

VE said...

roy - They should train for it! College helps...

perpetual chocoholic - Note for future...ban kids...

aladdinsane12 - Visualize yourself in a Panzer tank crumpling that guy in front of you that didn't pay attention and caused you not to make the light in the first place...

moondustwriter said...

putting on toe nail polish and driving - gotta try it - LOL

lime said...

my neck hurts just looking at that picture. i think i need to go to the chiropractor just thinking about the pretzel i'd be in if i slept that way.