By now most of my long time readers have figured out for themselves that while I'm not stupid by any means, I also have no common sense.
I mean, wasn't I the guy that
- Kept on going right past the warning sign that said "Danger, wounded bear in area" sign at the Alaska trailhead (and of course I did run right into a grizzly...just not that one)
- Didn't see the sign that warned of waves that would invert you and leave you paralized (which I boogy boarded anyway and end up inverted, snapped my neck and cut open my eye)
- Got bored and took a long stroll outside in Taiwan while Super Typhoon Zeb was in full force (still in the top 15 largest storms ever)
The list goes on.
And so it comes as no surprise when I tell you that Portland finally had to pay for the dry and gentle weather we had in Nov/Dec by lashing out with a monsoon of rain all at once...and I needed to do my run outside so might as well just get wet and go anyway.
Now we're not talking your typical misty rain that Portland usually gets. This was full on drenching rain; the kind that overflows streams and rivers and causes roads to collapse and houses to slide off those stupid hillsides they shouldn't have built them on in the first place.
And I thought...seriously, how bad could it be?
Ok, it was bad. Very bad. There was a portion I had to go across our running path that had a river with rapids going across it. It looked a bit like this...
I was regularly running in 6 to 8 inches of water throughout the 6 mile loop and some places were up over a foot.
Normally I don't wear a jacket ever but decided to put on my running rain jacket. What a joke. I had to tilt my arms down every minute or so to let the water poor out of them like I was a human tea pot.
My running cap kept the rain out of my face and that felt pretty dry until, to add insult to injury, a rogue blackberry bush reached out and snagged it as I ran by. As I went back for it that damn blackberry bush dropped it into a giant puddle leaving me to have to wring it out and put the soggy thing back on my now much wetter head. Ughh.
And just when I thought I'd was the only fool out running, suddenly another person came by running in...get this...a cotton sweatshirt.
I cannot imagine how heavy that sweatshirt got after a mile or so as it soaked up rain like a sponge. In fact, he might has well have worn a sponge.
Sponge running tops haven't quite caught on at the competitive level though. You could just hear the announcer at the Olympic Marathon..."I don't know what happened. He was running so light and fast earlier in the race and then the rains hit..."
So, I tipped my arms down to drain my sleeves, smiled that there was somebody out with less common sense than me and finished my epic run.
The positive was that my shoes had become so caked with mud from trail running lately that they were unrecognizable as to what brand they were. This run fixed that nicely.