Friday, June 01, 2012

Aww...Shit!

Remember when you were a kid (or at last weeks work lunch) when somebody would say something ridiculous to you...

"Would you drink this whole bottle of Tobasco sauce for $100?"

Remember that game?

Well...there are times in life when that game manifests itself into reality.

Case in point, I'm sitting down with the wifey-poo at dinner the other night enjoying some left over pizza we'd brought home from some swanky pizza restaurant.  Suddenly my tongue registers that there is something odd about my lower left molar.

I mention it to the wifey-poo, who knows more about denistry than you or I will EVER want to and she takes a look.  Sure enough, I'd popped a crown and eaten it.  Funny...I don't remember requesting gold crowns as one of my pizza toppings, but never mind that...

So the reality of my situation has just manifested into that old childhood game...

"Would you shit in bag and root through that shit until you find your gold crown, then fish it out, clean it up and remount it to your tooth for $900?"

Hmm...that's enough money to have to think about it for a moment.

Now the thought of wearing a crown that had been previously sitting in my poo has to be placed on the con side of the old pros/cons list if you ask me.

Saving $900 is a definite pro item but then again, it's not like I'm gaining any money, I'm just avoiding losing money.

Shitting in a bucket with a plastic garbage bag?  Definite con...

Playing with my poo as I try to find it?  That would only be a pro if I were a fly or had some strange fetish we all won't even bother to contemplate.  No, definitely a con.

In the end, I gladly forked out the money for a new one because there are some lines I just won't cross...

6 comments:

The Incredible Woody said...

My husband doesn't even like the thought of using paper towels that are made from recycled material. No WAY that crown would go back in his mouth!

ReformingGeek said...

I'm happy with your choice to spend the money!

Mrsupole said...

When my crown came off I was lucky enough to not swallow it but since it wasn't gold they made me a new one. Thank goodness for dental insurance. Ever since then I seem to be afraid to eat caramel which I think causes more crowns to fall off then any other type of food. So glad that none of my crowns are gold and I will never have to make that choice.

God bless.

Kurt said...

I would TOTALLY have fished for it. Come to think of it, I would fish through YOUR poo if I could keep the crown and sell it at one of those CASH FOR GOLD places.

Serena said...

Yeah, I'd have shelled out for a new one, too. I'm pretty squeamish.:)

VE said...

incredible woody - Hmmm...what are recycled paper towels made of? Not horse ears or something really disturbing I hope...

reforminggeek - Sure...as long as it was MY money...

mrsupole - Dental insurance? I don't have that anymore. Medical insurance? I don't qualify. Ridiculous. I ride or run every day, take no medications, have a clean healthy lifestyle and body fat at only around 8% but because I had a random PE last year, nobody will insure me.

kurt - That's good to know...I'll fed ex two weeks worth of stool to you. I always save my stool for just such an occasion...

serena - I was hoping for a new high tech one with like dolby stereo or something but naw...just plain gold